RTADS

RTADS apparently stands for something to do with an air defense system. Well, not in this case. I like to say it’s the “Refusal to Answer the Door Syndrome”

I’ve noticed over the past several years that everyone in my family has this. I know that I have it the worst. Since my Dad stopped Pastoring, I haven’t felt the need to answer the door for the strange people that often knock on it.

RTADS comes from having 9 million people come to your home over the course of your lifetime. Eventually, you just don’t want to answer the door. You’re tired, your house is a mess, you’re in your pajamas, you haven’t brushed your teeth in 8 hours. It’s just NOT a good time. The funny thing about it is that we don’t answer the door when it’s OBVIOUS that we’re home.

For example, today the doorbell rang. I was in bed, I wasn’t getting up.. I don’t care who it was! If it’s that important, CALL! But no, like every other person they stand outside the door for a good TEN MINUTES. If someone doesn’t come, just leave…seriously. In the event it was someone reading this and you were at my door… well, yeah, i guess I’m sorry about that. All of our cars were here, it was morning, I know it was obvious we were home.

My parents don’t even know that I avoid it as much as I do. While they’re in the back room of the house (and therefore cannot hear anything), they have no idea how many times I look out my window, shrug and say, “um, no thanks.” My favorite is when no one in our house answers a knock when the front door is wide open. The screen door is closed, but the main door is wide open. OBVIOUSLY we’re home and we STILL refuse to answer it. It amuses me to no end.

Here are a few tips if you plan on showing up at my house.

  • call first
  • if we don’t come in the first 30 seconds, give up.
  • don’t even think about coming before 1 pm. that’s crazy.
  • if i’m asleep on the couch and you walk in at 7 am… it’s going to be straight ugly.
  • if our door is not locked and you walk in, there will undoubtedly be someone without the proper attire on.
  • even if you see me peek out of my blinds, it does not mean i’m going to answer the door
  • you will often hear people’s feet running through the house and people yelling “look out the window! hide! no one answer it!” (this happens when the crazy people show up)
  • don’t expect to have a place to sit if you actually do come in. no, really.
  • 75% of the time, it’s going to be me answering the door with my hair in a weird fro and saying “uhm..hold on” i will close the door (letting that person stand on the porch aimlessly) while I go and get my dad, who will then have to find a shirt…(which could take anywhere from 5-10 min)
  • our doorbell IS NOT broken and we DO HEAR knocks. you don’t have to keep going.
  • PLEASE, don’t go back and SIT in your car…wait..and then try again. If we didn’t come the first time and we’re home…just move on.

Please understand that this doesn’t happen to everyone that shows up. Just the people that no one has seen since 1979 and the people who are mentally insane, physically scary to look at or people who drive a ratty pick up truck (because in my experience..the people listed above often drive one).

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