Acceptance

Acceptance is said to mean consenting to welcome what is perceived as reality. I had a moment of acceptance tonight on my way home. I was staring out of the passenger’s side window and taking in the cobalt blue sky that was just beginning to be overtaken by a blanket of black and I decided it was finally time for acceptance.

Sometimes making that choice appears to cancel a previous moment of acceptance. I started to remember the first moment of reality in regards to the matter I am now learning to accept and it took place under the glow of a bright orange streetlight on a warm night much like tonight. I had welcomed hope, freedom, the possibility to believe in a life that seemed to bleed outside the lines. I was ready for a world of endless wander and an uncharted path. I took that path and it brought me to tonight.

While this moment of acceptance seems far less enchanting than the one I crashed into all those years ago, I realize that the wind has carried off that season and I am now face to face with a new kind of possibility. Perhaps the aforementioned road served only to explain the moment I had tonight. It seems that it means to teach me to believe in a blessing I don’t understand. Somehow, all this time He’s been saving me… He’s been honoring all the prayers I’ve prayed, even though it appears that He simply disregarded them.

He withholds no good thing. He does not withhold himself.

Finally, I can accept that this reality is somehow in my best interest.