The Things That Matter

I sat down and made a list of things I know.

I made a list of things I know right in this moment, to see if they were enough to keep me moving forward.

There were nineteen bullet points on that list. I had to ask myself if that was that enough to make me move forward in things that feel pretty risky.

If I’m being honest, I feel like I need at least fifty things on the list of certainties before I can take a risk. Let’s be real, nineteen isn’t really in the ballpark of fifty.

I sat there, tears on my face as I realized that sandwiched there in the middle were three of the most important things I could ever write. These certainties, these things I know to be true, are all that it should take for me to take a leap.

Figure out what matters.

That’s my advice to you. In whatever situations you’re sitting with, in whatever battle you’re fighting, figure out what matters and let that make your choice.

There are always going to be questions. You’ll always have little doubts trying to weasel their way into your ear drums, trying to settle in there and make their voice a permanent part of your story. You will always be fighting uncertainty in one way or another. You can have fifty-one things on your list of reasons why you should or shouldn’t, but if you don’t have the most important things covered, it was never even worth picking up the pencil.

Figure out what it is you’re really looking for, who you’re trying to be, where you’re trying to go. Get those things covered and if what you are considering lines up, stop looking for more confirmation. Stop waiting for all fifty spots to be filled in. If you’re staring at number eleven, twelve, and thirteen and they make you cry and say to yourself, that’s the heart of it, that’s what I’ve really been in search of, then you’d be crazy not to take that chance.

You would be crazy to back away in fear when your heart has a chance to see the miracles you’ve waited for.

We make things too complicated. We want all the answers when we’re too afraid to even ask the questions.

Did you ever play the foot game when you were little? The one where everyone would make their feet into a circle and someone would sing a silly song and rule everyone out and the last foot in won the game?

Your chances were better always better when both feet were in.

You’ve got to jump into this thing with both feet, kid. You’ve got to stop keeping one of your feet out of the circle. You’re doing it because it protects you, because it’s easier to only have one foot rejected than both. You’ve got to decide here and now if you’re in or out. 

Are you committed to this thing?

God once asked me that about a circumstance I was dancing around. Are you going to be involved or are you going to be committed?

I chose commitment.

It was one of the hardest, but most amazing things I’ve ever done. The next thing I knew, I was up to my knees in a mess that seemed impossible to stand in. But I learned, I learned things that only commitment can teach you. 

You’ve got to decide, you know. Decide if you’re involved, if you’re committed, or if you’re bowing out.

Figure out what’s important. Figure out who you are, what you’re called to. If this is what you have really been looking for, stop waiting for flashing arrows and someone to give you that fiftieth reason why you should say “yes”. If it’s just not quite right, crumple the paper and go in search of the important things.

We’re always going to want to play it safe, and we’re going to always want a perfect plan. Sometimes, what you really need is the moment of clarity that comes when you’re staring straight at the few, but mighty things that actually matter. 



[photo cred]

2 thoughts on “The Things That Matter”

  1. I really liked this particular post… I even like the picture you choose for it.. The window very fitting.. Since I am also looking,the window seemed where I would stare out looking for the answers… I had a girlfriend who I am still speaking to almost daily. It is usually pleasant, but every now and then she will just go off on a tangent ..and throw up every little thing. She doesn’t see any role what’s so ever she played,though I was as she put it a real jerk when she first started dating me.. She came on so fast and strong after having been in two back to back was a little to much for me. I just wanted to take things slowly,get to know her . She made me aware of things I never even thought about,like giving her a key to my house after we had been dating for some time. I am also trying to further my education and I have a daughter who is ill. This took a lot of my focus the first couple of years …she just didn’t understand that these are things we weather ..and I guess I was so consumed with my child’s mental and physical health,which is very serious that I over looked my relationship. I don’t really think at that time I was able to fully have one.. So now things are calmer, but she has changed,says she no longer has feelings,which brings me back to thinking she rushed things.. She told me she loved me after a few weeks, I was shocked and rather speechless at time. I felt she was on a rebound of some sort, I mean how can you be in love with someone you hardly know. I called her a relationship hopper ..didn’t go over well. I said how can you be in love then and now you are ready to move on,because things didn’t progress as fast and in the order you felt they should. I need to focuse on me, college and decide to just let go. I find it so painful because I feel she is the one,…the one I want to be just took me longer

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